Playoffs Day 6 + 7

NLDS Game 4: Giants 3, Braves 2

Giants win series 3-1
W: Madison Bumgarner (1-0), L: Derek Lowe (0-2)
S: Brian Wilson (2)
HR: SF Cody Ross (1), ATL Brian McCann (1)

The Giants won this game and clinched the series on the road, despite douchey closer Brian Wilson walking two runners with no one out at the bottom of the 9th inning. Although this was San Fran's first Division title since 2003, their accomplishment was overshadowed by the fact that it was also Braves manager Bobby Cox's last game. He's been managing the Braves for the last 24 years! The Giants saluted him before going back into the visitor's clubhouse and spraying champagne everywhere. Baseball, always classy.

Top: Thanks Bobby
Middle: Bobby
Bottom: Ghost Bobby

ALDS Game 5: Rangers 5, Rays 1

Rangers win series 3-2
W: Cliff Lee (2-0), L: David Price (0-2)
HR: TEX Kinsler (2)

Cliff Lee dismantled the Rays at home, beating young starter David Price in their second match-up of the series and leading Texas to their first ever postseason title. Over a complete nine innings, Lee gave up just six hits and one run and struck out 11. Although, he did not strike out B.J. Upton three times, as predicted, he did break recently mulleted Evan Longoria's heart. Just leave Florida, Longoria. All of your teammates are doing it next year.

Texas cheering as Vladdy huff'n'puffs back home

Offensively, the Rangers profited from the strategic baserunning decisions / blind luck of Nelson Cruz and old-ass, bad-kneed Vladdy Guerrero, and a two-run homer in the 9th by diaper-autographing adult baby Ian Kinsler. After Cliff Lee got B.J. Upton to pop up to end the 9th inning, the Rangers ran out of their dugout, shrieking like harpies and hugged each other while jumping. The Rays just looked sad and disappeared. More extensive photographic evidence to come.

Meanwhile, the Phillies and the Yankees hung out and practiced.

Top: Cole Hamels, Roy Oswalt, Brad Lidge, Roy Halladay
Bottom: Jeter aiming for the sun

I did okay in my divisional predictions. I think I originally said Yankees in 4, Phillies in 3, Rangers in 4, Braves in 5, and one of those things came true. It's funny that the Yankees were the only team to clinch their divisional title at home-- a small kindness to the Twins and all other symbols of Midwestern decency, I suppose.

The Yankees will play the Rangers in Texas on Friday night for the beginning of the Championship Series.

Heart Conflict, Rays Drama

This is a photo of Joe Torre watching his heart-team rally to beat his job-team in the 10th inning.

The three Yankees-Dodgers games in LA this weekend were like a World Series of attractiveness. Thank you Interleague Play for bringing together the two best looking teams in baseball. More thoughts and photos to follow.

In other news, B.J. Upton and Evan Longoria quarreled in the Rays dugout after Upton failed to hustle in a game against the last-place Arizona D'Backs.

The oddly composed top photo of Upton's snarling mouth and Longoria's furrowed brow looks like an oil painting to me. "Portrait of the Rays as a Third Place Team," by The Associated Press.

Despite October Irrelevance, BJ Upton Still Annoying

Yesterday, Bossman Junior Upton became the first Tampa Bay Ray to hit for the cycle.  Despite quite liking the below photograph, I find him endlessly irritating.  Didn't help that dude got two hits off big-double-C on what was supposed to be his 20-win night.  Ugh. So annoying.  I may not be able to watch the rest of the Yankees' regular season if the non-awfulness of B.J. Upton continues.

But oh, what's that below? The Dodgers storming the NL West castle and taking the crown? Nah.  That's just them losing to the Rockies.  Who are now only one game back.  Also pictured is Matt Kemp throwing a temper tantrum after being called out at first base. 

I'm really having a hard time with blogger's new post editor.  Sometimes the internet gets me down.

DEREK HELP! I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S GOING ON-- IN THE WORLD OR ON THIS BLOG.

Ichiro o(^-^)m(-^ )e(^ )d( )e( ^)t( ^-)o(^-^)~♪

Ichiro hasn't been getting enough love on this blog. Last night, he hit TWO home runs to defeat the heavily favored Red Sox 5-4.

Here's the recap from ESPN.com:

"Who knows? It kind of proves that in the universe, mysterious things happen," he said through an interpreter.

Suzuki, an incomparable leadoff hitter and owner of the modern major-league record with eight consecutive 200-hit seasons, had a two-homer game while Ortiz, a five-time All-Star, hasn't hit even one homer in 158 plate appearances all season.

"It shows that, really, two mysterious things happened in the universe today," Suzuki said, looking up with a wry grin while fanning himself at his locker.

He is so COSMIC and MYSTICAL. Congratulations, Ichiro! I love it. What I don't love is Papi slumping so badly. The photos documenting his persistent un-homerunness just get sadder and sadder.

Anyway, in other news, here is what I wish were a photo of showboat B.J. Upton's head exploding after hitting a walk-off homer in last night's game against the Indians. Instead, it's merely a photo of him getting a plate full of shaving cream to the face (kudos to Kei for clueing me into this event, as well as Yahoo! MLB photos, in general).

It really looks like his face is melting! The following photo contains a different distortion of the truth...Obama is NOT a Phillies fan. Sam, back me up on this one.


Is Jimmy Rollins really that much shorter than our Commander-in-Chief? Who knew.