Thursday, September 29, 2011


Well...this happened...

Moreover, this happened....

It came down to the last out in the ninth inning. Then, it came down to the bottom of the twelfth inning four minutes later. I feel so happy even though I hate the Rays. I really, really hate the Rays. But...THE RED SOX. I'm speechless.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Some Other Teams Made the Playoffs

The Brewers, Rangers and Diamondbacks all won their divisions this weekend.

Will the less likeable Upton also join?

Friday, September 23, 2011

Okay, Fine.

I made a mistake: the Yankees are not above gratuitous celebratory displays.

Also, not immune to ugly championship graphics on their hats and t-shirts. Okay, okay. You won the division. Just please win the World Series, team.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

My Third Snoopy Day / The Yankees 8,000th Post Season Berth

Before we talk about the Yankees, here's a picture of Toronto Blue Jay Ricky Romero wearing a fake beak.

Now, let's get serious. The Yankees clinched a playoff spot this afternoon by winning the first game in their doubleheader against the Tampa Bay Rays. Unlike the unruly Philadelphia Phillies, they celebrated by shaking hands. “We still feel as though we didn’t accomplish anything yet,” said Derek Jeter. DJ, when you do accomplish something, please get nicer looking hats than the Phillies did.

Top: Johnny Damon, Older and Fishier
Bottom: Brett Gardner looks really short.

Yesterday was my favorite day of the baseball calendar: Yankee Snoopy Doll Day! The Yankees beat the Rays 5-0. The Red Sox also lost, so who knows what's going to happen with the American League wild card.

Robinson Cano looks really short.

I made Alex go to the game two hours early, so we got to walk down to the field level seats and watch the Yankee rookies take batting practice.

We also went to Monument Park for the first time, where I took this photo through the protective netting.

As you might know or imagine, Monument Park feels like a cemetery. This solemn, mournful feeling is greatly enhanced by the huge plaque of George Steinbrenner that dominates the entire back wall.

Other parts of the stadium are much more beautiful and life-affirming.

The new 2011 Snoopys wear navy blue t-shirts. Unlike the 2011 Snoopys, they have no collar and have a slightly shorter snout. The 2009 pin-striped Snoopys-- the original Yankee Snoopys, as far as I know-- look noticeably different than their successors, with slimmer heads and defined necks. My 2009 Snoopy has also gotten quite dirty, but I don't think that's a generational trait.

Do not let this picture fool you: there are five Yankee Snoopys in my life. This count includes neither my one Yankee Mickey Mouse doll nor my unaffiliated Snoopy that plays music when you squeeze his chest.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Everyone Knew This Would Happen

The Phillies won the World Series NL East title last night. They celebrated by putting on Pizza Hut delivery hats and dumping Budweiser tall boys on their coaches, before retreating to their locker room and spraying champagne at each other. Everyone knew this would happen! In unexpected news, Roy Halladay smiled for the first time.

Top: Antonio Bastardo
Middle: Smug Cliff Lee
Bottom: Smiling Roy Halladay

I'm desperately trying not to be eliminated from the championship round of my Dynasty Keeper Fantasy Baseball League, and it looks like everything hinges on Cole Hamels having a good start today. I scoured the Yahoo! Sports MLB photo gallery for evidence of any drunken misbehavior on Cole's part last night, but found nothing. I now feel like I can relate to parents who use Facebook to make sure that their high-school-aged children aren't taking party drugs.

Happily, Cole was serving mixed green salads to his wife and her friends and was nowhere near any cheap champagne, high school drop outs or prescription drug abuse. Whew. And Cole, we both know that you're on my team for LIFE, so just try to do your best today please.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Go Tigers! Hosmer Walk-off. Cycling Pandoval.

Last night, the Tigers won their division title for the first time since 1987. Congratulations Tigers! Clinching pitcher Doug Fister is on both of my Fantasy teams. He's cute, right? I've been on the fence for months, but I think I'll go ahead and call this one now: he's cute. He's at least as cute as Clayton Kershaw was before he became more horse-y than boy-ish. Doug Fister, may you follow in Clayton's career footsteps without losing your human good looks.

Miggy has a hand tattoo?

Eric Hosmer hit a walk-off double against the White Sox last night. I hope become a great team because I love Eric Hosmer and I love their uniforms.

Pablo Sandoval hit for the cycle two nights ago. Can you believe he hit a triple?

I'm already starting to have baseball separation anxiety. Go away, football. Baseball, don't go!

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Mariano 600th Save Photo Diary

I said I would, so I did.

I'm going to try and take all of the same photos of 602.


I've been waiting for someone to upload a photo or video of Mariano Rivera's 600th save for approximately ten minutes now, but even the Yankees' official March to History: Mariano Rivera website hasn't rolled over from 599 yet. I have to go to bed. Here's my favorite Mariano photo as a placeholder:

While the Yankees cruise to a playoff berth, the less steady Red Sox won their first game in six days, 18-6. Old, old Time Wakefield finally won his 200th game. Sox fans, stop freaking. The Rays aren't going to catch you. I read it on the internet.

In other news, Mr. Met was recently crowned the new Dark Lord of New York City. Will the Yankees sue him for emotional property theft?

He's done bad things in the past:

Photo via, also many other nice photos

There's probably 600 photos of Mo's 600th save online now, but we'll save that for tomorrow. Congratulations, Mariano! Congratulations, Mr. Wakefield! Congratulations, scary baseball mascot!

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Time Keeps Happening

"Like our bodies and like our desires, the machines we have devised are possessed of a heart which is slowly reduced to embers."

We're all getting old. Come back soon, Peyton.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

School Days

It's September. Time for school, sad folk music and playoffs baseball. Here's an amazing trove of Derek Jeter high school yearbook photos.

The internet tells me that Derek Jeter broke up with Minka Kelly because she's become too famous. I think it's probably because he knows that she'll never be in anything better than "Friday Night Lights."

But Derek, they're making a movie!