I don't want to talk about Evan Longoria's strained left oblique. I want to talk about his hair.
This mullet of free spirited curls isn't that bad when he keeps his hat on, especially considering this look:
Or this one:
Or this one:
APRIL FOOL'S! That's Johnny Damon. Did you see him fall down in left field the other day?
Please comment on Evan Longoria's AK-47, which was stolen recently. Love, Rachel.
ReplyDelete^It's a personal item and should increase his fantasy value, or negate the impact that his strained oblique has on his fantasy value. I mean, no other baseball player has an AK-47 floating around, with which delinquents and such can claim to have killed people! (Just kidding. Mordecai has both Longoria and Wright in a league and Mat Latos is his best pitcher. No one will trade him a good pitcher for Longoria, so I tried to hype him up this way, but it has failed.)
ReplyDelete"When asked about the weapon by news reporters, Longoria referred to it as a 'personal item' and refused further comment on it."
ReplyDeleteNow let's talk about their iPads.