Now Cracks a Noble Heart

This is what I get for laughing so joyously at those photos of crying kids: Grady Sizemore of the hard-luck Cleveland Indians will miss the rest of the season to have arthroscopic surgery on his left elbow and also some sort of lower abdominal surgery.

Grady, just please have your breakout year before the world ends in 2012.

So sad. As I've frequently mentioned, I used our Fantasy League's #1 draft pick on Grady Sizemore. If I could go back in time and re-spend my golden ticket, would I now choose Albert Pujols and his 43 home runs? Joe Mauer and his .366 batting average? Prince Fielder and his 121 RBI?

NO WAY!

Sometimes, you just have to follow your heart...even if it lands you in fourth place. Feel better soon, Grady! Ladies Love Us loves you forever.

In other news, in case you haven't heard, the Yankees are still #1. They're so #1 that there most likely will not be another #1 this year. Sorry Red Sox. Sorry Dodgers. Sorry Angels. My team's just the best.

"I am almost the Yankees all-time hits leader.

My end of season highlight reels will make you weep."

Derek Jeter took a short break from his path to becoming the universe's most important baseball player to watch the Yankees squeeze just one hit from formerly floundering Blue Jay ace Roy Halladay.

LOOK AT HOW HARD HE PITCHED! It's nice to see Doc back on track. That said, even he can't stop us now. WE'RE GONNA WIN THE WORLD SERIES AND THE PARADE IS GONNA BE AWESOME.