Review: An Ape, a Lion and an Indian (Revisited)

Happy Friday, baseball fans. Yesterday, we got Cajun comics from Rachel and a meditation on Johnny Damon's totally sick body hair from Sam. While I agree with Sam's critique of Damon's ape-like oafishness, I also think that baseball players who look like animals can be totally cute:




Joba Chamberlain's circular face makes my heart hurt. I like him so much that I wish I were his mom. These maternal instincts began on October 5, 2007, when he was attacked by insects during the second game of the ALDS against the Cleveland Indians. Now, whenever Joba throws a wild pitch or inexplicably interferes with a throw home or gets caught drunk driving in Nebraska post-strip club, I want to sit him down and say, "Let's do it better next time, honey."

We the authors of Third Base or Bust will be doing it better, too. On Monday, we invite you to nominate your favorite Fat Hottie / Hot Fattie. And, for those who will be helping Sam and I rank the divisions, MLB.com's Fantasy Baseball Preview should prove an invaluable tool. As I was scrolling through the never-ending sea of mediocre mugshots yesterday, I was reminded of how amazingly All-American hot Grady Sizemore is:



Apparently, the internet agrees. Ladies love Grady! Meanwhile, this guy really hates Johnny Damon.

Onwards and upwards!

P.S. to Kei-chan / Review Preview

I know that, technically, this kind of response belongs in the "comments" section, but I really wanted to share this with the world. I was in Japan during the Shinjo underwear campaign and it was INTENSE!


Anyway, here's a rundown of yesterday's posts:

Kei contributed a very excellent Top Five
Rachel expressed hometown pride with her Top One
Paul took it there.
I loved on Manny.

Starting next Friday, Sam and I will begin looking at each division in the Major Leagues and ranking its teams by level of attractiveness. We invite you to participate! Here's the schedule:

Feb. 13th, AL East
Feb. 20th, AL Central
Feb. 27th, AL West
Mar. 6th, NL East
Mar. 13th, NL Central
Mar. 14th, NL West

We've got many other exciting posts planned, so keep reading and thanks for your continued support of THE GREATEST SPORT IN THE UNIVERSE!!!!!!

Review, Preview

G'morning once again! Can you believe that this is only the third day of THIRD Base or Bust? Here's what happened yesterday:

1. Eric exhumed allegedly hot dead guy Kirby Puckett for our consideration:


2. Sam indulged a tangential reverie into NFL-land, then got back to business with his full Top Five.

3. Philco hit it out of the park with his post on Mike Schmidt.

Thanks, guys! In the near future:

1. Rachel will give it to her Top Five.

2. Journalism school graduate and sports aficionado Matt Blake will throw his weight around.

3. Paul will post something terribly inappropriate.

4. I will tell you interesting facts about two of my favorite baseball personalities. Because, unlike the men on this blog, I love with more than just my...eyes. As a preview, may I present, A Video Tribute to Ichiro Suzuki.







"Dude."
"Dude."

Review, Preview

Good morning! In case you missed it and are too lazy to scroll down, here's what happened yesterday on Third Base or Bust:

1. The blog was willed into existence (big thanks to Phil-co for his expert advice)
2. I gave you my Top 5
3. Hillary nominated Todd Walker for the Hall of Fame
4. Sam denounced Nick Swisher and demoted Derek Jeter
5. We learned that Dustin Pedroia's brother may be a pedophile
6. Mordecai unearthed this gem from the memory vault (re-posted from the comments):

Today, I'll be sitting around in a warehouse for most of the afternoon, but here are some things that may happen in my e-absence:

1. Sam may give us the rest of his Top 5
2. Phil may weigh in on famous baseball mustaches
3. Kei may highlight favorites from Japan's pro league

I'm looking forward to all of it!

Additionally, my friend Reid made a submission via email, stating:

"I'm still at work, so I haven't had a chance to check out your blog yet. Not sure how much I can contribute, seeing as how I'm straight and all, but you might want to check out jose canseco (steroid era), he was a good looking ballplayer. I'll think more about it later."


That's all for now!