Friday, October 30, 2009

THE EXPERTS SPEAK

Yesterday, I asked some friends how they felt about tonight's game. Here are their answers in chronological order. Yankee believers are coded in blue; Phillie dreamers in red:

"I think the score will be 5-4, with the Yankees losing in middle relief. My foolproof lock prediction. though, is that if the temp drops below 50 degrees, A-Rod's lips will be a really gross purple color by the 6th inning." -N.O., Red Sox fan, baseball oracle [correctly predicted CC would lose Game 1 and that Pedro would give up three runs over six innings in Game 2.]

"I think the score will be Phils 2, Yanks 10 with Ryan Howard HBP (to the face) in the 2nd and out for the rest of the World Series. Teixeira solo HR in the 4th inning and maybe 5 RBIs for Jeter." -J.W., Yankees fan, baseball blogger

"My prediction is that Yanks win with a walk off winning double in the 9th, winning 4-3. Posada will hit the walk off double, A-Rod strikes out four times and Howard hits a homer in the 7th to tie the game 3-3." -R.M., Mets fan, fantasy football adviser

"Tomorrow's game will be uneventful and rather boring." -J.C., Dodgers fan, big hater

"Let's go Eagles! Hometown pride!! Cole Hamels is like a rich man's James van der Beek. And God loves Dawson's Creek." -P.L., Mike Schmidt fan, internet user

"Yankees will win 5-1 and Johnny Damon will hit a home run." -P.S., Yankees fan, future doctor

"I predict that for Halloween Cole Hamels will be Cole-Hamels-the-2008-World-
Series-MVP, and act accordingly. With superpowers:

'I could get some kind of vampire superpowers, you never know,' Phillies Game 3 starter Cole Hamels said Friday'
vs.
'Coke said he made a vow: 'I'm not going to be that guy who jumps out of his hedges and scares the crap out of some unsuspecting little kid. Because I remember what that was like, man. I wouldn't want to make a little kid cry like that. I bawled my eyes out. It messed me up good.'' (via )'
-M.S., Mets fan, fantasy baseball commissioner

"I'm sorry, but I'm too excited about the MASHUP* of my two biggest interests right now, Glee and baseball, to predict the outcome of the game. The Glee cast will be performing the national anthem tomorrow! I am going to a party dressed as Rachel Berry, but most people will probably just think I'm a Japanese schoolgirl.

I will say the the philosophy of physics professor/baseball fanatic in my graduate program is leaning towards the Yankees but with 'more than a little guilt about this.' However, today I saw one of his longtime grad students wearing a Phillies hat in his office. He (professor, not student) wrote to me: 'More than anything else about the World Series, though, I hope I live long enough to see the games on TV without having Tim McCarver among the broadcasters. He just annoys me.' None of this is helpful at all, but I thought I'd share it anyway." -K.H., White Sox/Tigers fan, fantasy baseball champion

*"A mashup is when you take two songs and mash them together to make an even richer explosion of musical expression." --Mr. Schuester.


"The Yanks can't play Matsui in the outfield, but they'll try to because he had a home run the other night.

Playing real baseball and not American League ball will overwhelm Joe G. for at least one night when someone explains to him that he cant make his five million pitching changes and pinch running moves without making double switches or having pitchers hit.

He'll either do something like sub out Melky or Posada or wind up with Brett Gardner pitching an inning. So Molina or Jerry Hairston will wind up hitting in a critical spot and Joba will get stuck pitching to Ryan Howard, who will hit a ball 100 miles back to NYC.

In the Yankees last gasp, Jeter, getting excited about National Leage ball and moving runners over will try to bunt again, because he failed so badly the other night, and in turn take the bat out of the Yanks best hitter's hands. This will put runners in scoring position for A rod who will strike out or pop up.

In the post game Cole Hamels will say, without irony that he loves Philadelphia. He will one day sign with the Yankees." -M.B.W., Giants fan, ghostwriter

"I agree with Phil, the Eagles will win. And if I can hear Tim McCarver yelp as Jeter bunts with two strikes again the whole world series will have been worth it." -S.W., White Sox fan, baseball blogger?

"5-2 Phillies. Hamel pitches beautifully and Pettitte, with no drugs in his system, is more than hittable!" -H.D., Red Sox fan, Yankee hater


* * * *

This is what ESPN SportsNation thought as of 8pm last night:

Why is Alaska 85% certain that Cole Hamels is going to win tomorrow?

As for the paid experts, here are some World Series predictions that ESPN's baseball analysts made before Game 1. And here's a screen shot of what some ESPN baseball analysts look like:

If you don't want to read all of the predictions, let me tell you that 22 of the 24 analysts went with the Yanks in 5-7 games, with Karabell and Pedro Gomez both picking the Phillies in 6 games. Karabell, shut it. Pedro Gomez, I don't know who you are, but you shut it, too.

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